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A Personal Introduction

The Story Behind 44 LIGHTS: From Ground Zero to the Stage!

My name is Tim Tuttle and 44 LIGHTS is my story. It began on the morning of September 11, 2001. I was at Ground Zero. When I finally returned home eight hours later, having witnessed the unthinkable from my office across the street from the World Trade Center, words failed me. The reality of what I had seen—the horror, the loss of over 30 friends and neighbors—was too immense to articulate. Stunned and in disbelief, I picked up my guitar. What could not be expressed in speech slowly came out in song. As my wife, Barbara, later told me, it sounded like I was singing a prayer. That first song, “I Never Knew,” was born from a feeling of pure helplessness. I thought it would be the only one I'd ever write about that day. But when I went into a downtown Manhattan studio three weeks later to record it, I realized something profound: my healing was going to happen through music. Creativity was the only path forward for my broken heart. From a single song to a Memorial Concert Series That single song soon became ten, and then many more. Music became my therapy, a way to process the grief while honoring the friends I had lost. This personal project quickly evolved into a labor of love and community: Music From Ground Zero. For over twenty years, we have performed annual 9/11 memorial concerts in New York, singing the songs I have written. These events became a gathering point for a community of survivors—a space where we could collectively remember, mourn, and begin to heal. We found, as a city, a way to survive and to honor those whose lives were so tragically cut short.

(www.musicfromgroundzero.org)
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The Birth of a Musical: 44 LIGHTS
 
The transition from a concert series to a full-fledged musical felt both natural and inevitable. The most powerful catalyst was my wife, Barbara. Long before I did, she recognized a cohesive narrative of loss and love woven through the songs. Her belief took root, but it was during our 20th-anniversary concert that I truly understood. I looked out at the audience and realized that while the music was moving, it had become more of a tribute than a living story. The specific, deeply personal stories of friendship, survival, and the quiet moments of despair and hope that gave each song its meaning were missing. I knew then that the concert format had reached its limit; to truly honor the journey, the story had to be carried by characters and dialogue. The title, 44 LIGHTS, came from what I can only describe as a message. On the six-month anniversary of the attacks, I read in The New York Times that each beam in the "Tribute in Light" was created by a canister containing 44 halogen lamps. The number 44 has always held deep meaning for me—it was my number in sports through high school and college. In that moment, I felt a sign that everything was going to be alright. I wrote the title song, “44 Lights,” that same night. It became the heart of our concerts and the catalyst for the musical you see today—a story not just of loss, but of finding a way to live, heal, and love again.

(www.44Lights.com)